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"Dreamer" Sleeping. She was always sleeping, it seemed. Even if she wasn't particularily tired, she usually passed the time by sleeping it off. Besides that, the lull of the wagon made her lethargic anyway. Not that she really knew the meaning of the word lethargic, but it was worth a shot. That was how it used to be, anyhow. Now she was scared of sleeping; terrified to death of it. Because whenever it overtook her, the nightmares came. Of course, sometime whispered in her ear that it was more than simple nightmares; the visions of the crawling flame; something deeper. She wasn't sure what it was and she decided she didn't WANT to know the 'more' behind those dreams. Because they terrified her. Pilika sometimes vaguely wondered how she had gotten to get aboard this wagon, in the first place. With these people. Oh, she recognized Jowy-niichan, certainly-- Uncle Jowy was someone she admired and loved with all her heart. But these other people, she didn't know. And when she tried to summon up the memory clips that told her how and when she had met Jowy-niichan, it was a blank. She wasn't sure what it meant; it just was not something she could do. But even so, something inside seemed to make her want to be by herself more often than she used to be; it used to be that she was content to sit in Jowy's lap the entire day, but now, sometimes, she liked to just stop and think without others bothering her. What she thought about... she wasn't really clear on that, either. Sometimes it scared her. But Pilika couldn't stop, for some reason. It was almost like an addiction. Because she knew something was wrong with her not remembering anything beyond the wagon ride. It felt like it was something important. But that didn't matter, did it? A shadow once told her that the present was the most important thing to focus on. She blinked. A shadow?? A flickering image of a man who hugged her and lifted her up and called her kind names. But then it was gone and there was only the blankness again. She was in one of those moods again, one of those feelings where she didn't want to be bothered, not even by Jowy. She yawned and rubbed her eyes, as they were red and scratchy. She really wanted to rest, but a part of her told Pilika that bad things would happen the minute she closed her eyes. But she made a decision that the same shadow once told her that nightmares were nothing to be afraid of, because they could just be driven off if the dreamer was strong enough. And she was strong... right? Strong enough to chase away phantoms and illusions. She snuggled into a sleeping position from where she was, confident that she would be able to overcome anything that her subconscious threw at her. Nightmares weren't real, after all. Unless they weren't nightmares after all, but sealed up memories. We made a decision before to keep them away, right?? So we wouldn't see the Monster or Mommy and Daddy again. That's what we agreed on, wasn't it? Wasn't it?? We?? Pilika felt bewilderment flood her mind. We?? She was confused, emerged in her own dream world again, where colors spun, most overrode by red-- she hated red, even though she wasn't sure why. And who was talking to her? And what was this we stuff?? Pilika felt her head spinning. But you didn't keep your part of the deal and now I'm stuck with the bad stuff and you get to have a clean slate. Lucky you. But at least I can remember Mommy and Daddy, right?? Of course I remember them-- especially when they died and their blood spilled on the ground while the Monster was laughing. Of course I remember THAT. 'Cause you stuck me with it. I guess it's sort of even, since you can't remember anything even before the White Monster appeared n' made everything die. But it's not fair that I get the blood and you don't. And it's not fair that you can have Jowy-niichan and I can't. It's not fair. Go away, she ordered smugly. You're not real. 'Cause Mister Shadow told me so. You're just a nightmare and Pilika can make you go away whenever she wants. Mister Shadow?? You mean Daddy? That's really, really.... silly. There was laughter, but it wasn't nice laughter. Almost like the White Monster's laughs that shook the ground with its terrifying noise, twisted cruelly by its childish tone. She was frightened now, very frightened. If it was just a nightmare, shouldn't she be able to chase it away? More confusion, like mist seeping into her mind. Dreamer-Pilika. Dreamer-Me. Go away!! Pleading, desperate now, her instinct was to turn and flee for all she was worth-- Please, please leave me alone.... Dreamer. Her eyes lifted at that moment, and she found she wasn't in the wagon anymore-- even though she still saw Jowy and the two other people she didn't really know. Except Jowy-niichan was carrying her, and the scary girl was battering some monsters. It looked like they were on some kinda path. A very very misty path. She sighed and hugged her Uncle closer to her. She didn't know who the voice was, but Pilika couldn't chase her off like the shadows reassured her she could. And that really, really scared her.
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